Braver than a mouse maybe

If I tell you all a secret, you have to promise it will be just between us and we'll never say this out loud, not even in a whisper. Ok? Good. *Sigh* Here it goes.

I'm sitting on a plane right now, flying to someplace that isn't where you are and all I can think is "I hate leaving home". I haven't even been gone an hour and I miss everyone so much, it's all I can do to keep from crying. Fortunately, some little part of me knows I love arriving even more than I hate leaving, but right now that little part is only a shadow of a thought. I want to be home so badly. I want to be sitting with someone I love and watching them smile for any reason at all.

And it's funny ho little and silly this makes me feel. I know this is just as much me as the brave adventurer everyone mistakes me for, but I think you'd all think I'm only teasing if I said this to you. This morning for example, I was talking with a wonderful friend, someone I admire very much for their unfailing spirit, and she was telling me that she'd been ill and the doctors had done some particularly unpleasant tests. But when I called her brave, she scoffed and said "This from the Queen of Brave". It was the silliest thing I'd heard in awhile. I don't know that I've ever done a brave thing in my life, and I can count the days in my life that I've been entirely unafraid on one hand.

I know some people say that being brave means doing things you are afraid to do, and if that's all it is, then maybe I am brave, but I certainly don't feel it. Oh well, who's to say for sure. I'm just trying to get the most out of the time I have, and if that seems brave, I guess I'm ok with that.

But I'm getting sappy and this is getting us no where. I guess I just wanted to say that I love and miss you all, from the very moment we parted until we're together again.

Hoping to be home soon!

P.S. It really is beautiful up here. I wish you could see it.